28 April 2009

love, loss, and hope

I haven't written in a while, not for lack of topics--the back pile is bigger than it ever has been--but for lack of focus.

You see, the first of my college chicas, my MTU girls, lost a parent last month. It hit us all so much harder than we ever could have imagined. Those of us in MI traveled there to be present in person while those out of state sent their love through the airwaves. Words are not enough. Actions seem hollow. There is nothing you can do to help ease the pain. My heart broke and continues to do so for my Jamers. I will continue to be there for you in any way I can. Any way you need me. I was so honored to be able to be there for you that weekend. Meeting the "Irish Lady" and hearing stories about your dad from his brothers--that is something I will always cherish. I was also thrilled to be able to help out this past weekend. Seriously, your mom and G-ma and Katie and Ryan--all so welcoming and nice. I loved hearing more about your dad (Comcast debacle, kumquat & lemondrop, etc.). Thanks for inviting me in. Thanks for sharing.

I was just starting to gain some perspective on the whole situation when a bomb just dropped on me. In the ladies room at work no less. I ran into one of my work pals and she shared with me that she has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer. She is young and happy and full of life. How can this be? Why her? Questions that really have no answers, but they haunt your brain anyway. I'm feeling blurry and unfocused again. I know it will pass. Probably too quickly at that. I need to regroup and center myself around the only thing I've found that helps--my faith.

Sending out prayers to all suffering and in need.